Happy Birthday Carney Folk!

Last night we had a Murder Mystery Dinner Party for Josh.  It was so much fun.  My only regret is that we could not include more people.  It is so hard to have people over to our tiny house and there were only 8 parts in the game.   The game we bought was Honky Tonk Homicide. It is a western themed dinner party.  We basically had over our small group from church and our friends the Billings.  The Billings also brought over their sweet babe Grayson who is only a few weeks younger than Jacy.  They got to hang out while the adults were being crazy. Also Jacy did a good job sharing her swing and bedroom.  I'm so proud.  

How this game works is that you buy a kit and it comes with scripts and clues to figure out a crime.  Here are the characters and the background of the game. The people's names are our friends who played each the part. If you know them, you know why the parts are so funny! 

It's last call for Bubba Angus, owner of Bubba's Bar in Cactus, Texas. Late tonight, he was found
dead in his office - shot and killed with a .22 caliber pistol.

YOU are one of eight suspects at the forefront of the murder investigation. Bubba was the town snake, but who did he bite with enough venom to trigger his murder?
This small town definitely has its share of secrets. Let the truth be known…

Sheriff Sissy Wesson (Kristy) – The sexy, yet fierce and respected, sheriff of Cactus, Texas 

 

 Carney Folk (Josh Howard) – An angry and sleazy carnival worker, passing through town. 

 

  Rowdy Lawless (Justin) – A bad boy with a short temper and love for his bike.

Twyla Fleetwood (Kyle) – Cactus Court Trailer Park owner and designer of her own nuclear holocaust bunker.

 

 Dusty Diamond (Dustin) – Host of Karaoke Night at Bubba’s with big dreams of Country Western

stardom. "Ah got big dreams!"

  Crystalline Daniels (Melissa) – The young, beautiful, and promiscuous barmaid.

 Reverend Jim Bob Eternity (Luke) – The town’s beloved (and sleazy) TV evangelist.
Mary Kay Eternity (Amy) – The preacher’s wife, struggling for her own identity. 

Kid Spurbottom (Josh B.) and Millie Moonshine (Holly) and their sweet babe, Grayson - Poor people stuck in the bar trying to figure out who killed Bubba. What was that baby doing in a bar?  Oh wait, my kid was there too...

If you have never done one of these parties, you should.  It was so fun!  It was a little intense on the set up and food preparation but everyone had a good time.   I am looking forward to doing it again.  I want to do this one about a prom. I just think it would be funny to get to wear silly 80's prom dresses.  Also, chances are someone will be preggers and a pregnant prom queen might be just a funny as a pregnant trailer park owner.

 

Also, you can only use this game once. So if you are looking for a good time, Honky Tonk Homicide is for sale. : ) This game is NOT for kids...

3 Stories of TMI

Let me first start by saying thanks for still reading my blog again after that disaster of a post that was written at 3 am.  It was super over dramatic with a ton of grammatical and syntactical errors to boot. NO MORE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT POSTS FOR ME!!! Thanks for all the kind words and advice I received.  It was very sweet and helpful.  I have yet to reply to everyone because so many people messaged me.  If you sent me some words of wisdom, it was greatly appreciated and I promise I will get back to you. Keep the advice and encouragement coming!
But first, I need some lightheartedness up in the blog.
When you are a parent, no topic is off limits. I find that I talk mostly about something that comes out of the human body.  If you are squeamish you should probably just skip this post.  If you find bathroom humor as funny as the Howard's do, read on my friend.

Story 1 -
Our family took a trip to Knoxville this weekend for a friend's wedding.  On the way, we stopped at the yuckiest gas station in the state of Kentucky. This should not have been a problem since we only had to get gas and nurse Jacy in the car.  We stopped and Josh took a very happy, smiley, cooing Jacy out of her car seat only to find a puddle of neon yellow poo in the bottom of her car seat.  Josh immediately began saying things like "Whoa!" and "Oh my gosh girl!" I got out of the car and he brought her to me holding her out at arms length.  I quickly saw that her entire back from knees to shoulder blades was COVERED in poop.  It was not a good look.  I quickly scanned for a bathroom but saw they were outside the gas station and one shady looking lady was coming out.  There was not a changing table and that floor was not an option. I bit the bullet and changed her on the front seat of the car.  We basically went through an entire box of wipes. I had to clean her, my seat, and myself while Josh cleaned her car seat.  It was mess.  Jacy thought this was so funny and was so happy and smiley the entire time.  I eventually got her clean (enough) and put some new clothes on her and proceeded to the hotel.  When we got there we took Jacy out the car seat and she still smelt so bad.  She got a sink bath in the hotel bathroom.  We had not planned on giving her a bath so we didn't really have her soap or anything.  We used mine and got over it.

.

Story 2 -
I have been working really hard to keep a clean house.  I have to say, I am doing a much better job than I ever have before.  While cleaning the floors in the living room I kept finding a these little round water spots on the floor.  I kept thinking, "Man! Those pugs! They keep dripping water all over the house"  Then I realized that it would be darn near impossible for the dogs to be dripping water that far from their water bowl.  The next time I started to clean the floors, I saw them again.  I again blamed the flat faced members of our family.  Finally, about a week ago I turned on the light in the middle of the night to find that it was I was dripping breast milk all over our floor in the living room.  I now dress drastically different at night. No more "water spots" on the living room floor.

Story 3 -
Jacy had her first snotty nose. The little bulb aspirator they give you the hospital was just not getting all the junk out of her nose. She would also scream her head off anytime we tried to use this.  She was having some trouble eating due to her blocked airways so I finally broke down and bought this little gem:

The funny part is, that as soon as we bought it, it became a competition between Josh and I to see who to suck the most snot out of our kid's head.  Josh definitely won, but I like to think I loosened things up for him.  I would like to mention, this thing works AWESOME and it much more comfortable for Jacy than that bulb they give you at the hospital. She thinks is funny and I always think it is cool how much we can get out of her head.  I even said to Josh, "They should sell these for adults." What the heck is wrong with me.

Date Night FAIL

Writing this on my phone after a 3am feed...

While I was pregnant, everyone kept telling me that Josh and I needed to be sure we got out of house and away from Jacy for a date night as soon as possible. Josh and I had talked about this advice and decided it was a good idea. We know that we need to nurture our relationship as husband and wife and not just co-parents. So when we heard about a movie with free child care being offered at our church we took them up on that. We also decided to so dinner with Jacy before the flick.

During dinner, even though Jacy was there, Josh and I had great conversation. We were laughing and talking about all kinds of things it felt really good to have this time with my very best friend. It was so sweet how we took turns tending to Jacy's needs but never stopped talking or enjoying each other. I remember thinking, if the date is this great with Jacy here, going to the movie and discussion (people from the film were doing q&a after) without Jacy is going to be awesome.

When we got to church we were cutting it close to start time, so we took Jacy to the nursery right away to drop her off. it was fun talking with her and Josh about how she was going to "go party with her new friends" and to print out her first little name tag. There were a ton of people in the nursery dropping off their babies so I felt a little worried. By the time I had walked a few feet I was feeling pretty sick. I kind of started to get teary eyed but Josh put his arm around me and told me she would be fine. From that point on I could not think of anything but Jacy. I could not talk about anything but Jacy. I didn't understand how we could have had such a great dinner where we could enjoy each-others company to the mess we were in. I was sitting there trying to enjoy the movie and my husband. I kept telling myself to knock it off, but I just couldn't.

An hour into the movie I had to go feed Jacy, and to be honest I could not get there quick enough. When I got to her, she was a bucket of tears and was being consoled by a very sweet girl who was just getting ready to call me. I fed Jacy and put her in one of the swings then went back to the movie for the discussion. Again, all I was thinking of was Jacy and what if she was hungry or crying again. At the end of the discussion I could not get to her fast enough. We when we got to the nursery she was the last one in there. She was being rocked by the same sweet girl. At first I was relieved but then I saw her binky in her mouth and the girl told us she was getting very fussy. I knew she was hungry. I was so mad that I didn't just take her back to the movie so I could feed her when she needed it. I just felt so guilty about not being there when she needed me, which made me feel guilty for not enjoying my time with Josh. I started crying as soon as I got back to the car. Jacy started screaming because she was hungry and I felt that I had ruined our date by flipping out.

I worry a lot that I am not giving Josh the love and attention he needs. I worry a lot that our marriage is going to get "all jacked up" because I can't quit caring for Jacy. I worry a lot I guess.

When we got home I feed the kid forever and put her to bed. I still could not stop feeling guilty about ruining date night with all my worry and crying. I decided to go to bed myself. I was reading before bed and the topic of marriage was the very next chapter in the book I am reading. In the beginning it was highlighting the fact that nurturing your marriage and tending to your spouse's needs is very important. I started to feel sick again for being a failure as a wife. But as I continued reading, it began talking about how our culture, especially in some Christian circles, places a lot of value on leaving your kids out of the loving and nurturing of your marriage. And while this can work well for a lot of families to have set times kid free, it is not a one size fits all solution to making time for your spouse. It also talked about how our culture views children as our enemies who are are constantly trying to drive a wedge between us and our spouse. What a sad thought to think that you cannot allow your child to see you talking and growing closer to your spouse.

I felt much more peaceful knowing I was my the only person in the world who felt this way and fell asleep reading before I got to alternative ways to nurture your marriage baby-sitter free. I think I was tired from all the emotions of the night. I always try to think that the good news is that we get a chance to try it again. Man this is tricky.

Preparation

I read a ton of pregnancy, childbirth, and infant care books while I was pregnant. When I say a ton, I mean it. Here is a short list of books I have read. (note - some I just sampled or skimmed)

Husband Coached Childbirth
Birthing From Within
Womanly Art of Breastfeeding
Mayo Clinic Guide to Healthily Pregnancy
What to Expect When Your Expecting
The Birthing Book
Childbirth Without Fear
The Fussy Baby Book
Childbirth the Bradley Way
Babywise
The Attachment Parenting Book
The No Cry Sleep Solution
The No Cry Nap Solution
Eat, Sleep, Poop
Spirit- Led Parenting
The Baby Book
The Thinking Women's Guide To Childbirth
The Happiest Baby on the Block

I am sure there are some I missed. I basically looked at any book I could get my hands on. It was kind of weird to be constantly loosing myself in baby centered literature but I am so glad I did. Not because I learned a ton about birth, infant care, or child rearing. But because I realized a ton about myself and my creator.

I don't not want to mess this up. I take parenting so seriously it could make me crazy. Besides my marriage, I cannot think of another thing I care more deeply about. I think being a parent is the most important job I will ever have. I cannot dream of a better or more effective way to share the gospel or affect the world. It is really mind-blowing.

With that being said, I will mess this up. No matter how hard I try or how much guidance I receive, I will fail as a parent at some point. I came to realize this by reading the list of books above they would all say things like "Don't worry if you... Its not to late... You can try again" I remember thinking "TRY AGAIN! - there is no TRY!!!" Infact, it is the only common thread that all the books above have in common. And if the only things these books have on common is consoling patents once something is not going well, it must be unavoidable. Which makes sense, I am an imperfect being so my parenting skills will also be flawed. It was a hard pill to swallow for me.

For those of you who know me well, you know I tend to be a pretty passionate person in general but never in my life have I felt the kind of desire to invest in anything the way I want to invest in Josh and Jacy. I want to work hard to be Godly, fun, wise, helpful, loving, and supportive wife and mother.

I am so glad I am not doing this alone. I have a wonderful God who will help me parent Jacy and be a living supportive wife.

GO BABY GO

long time, no post.... 

I have been wanting to update for a LONG time.  We have just been so busy and I feel that I have to get some other things done before I allow myself time for writing for my blog.

Jacy is now 8 weeks old.  She is awesome.  She is the best baby ever. In fact, sometimes she is a little too good.  She sleeps all night and it stresses me out. I set an alarm to get up with her but at 3am I have started to turn off the alarm without really waking up.  I should just quit worrying so much about her food intake.  She currently weighs 13.5 pounds.  She is super cute and happy all the time. I should just be thankful.

I love them

We have also gone out of town the past two weekends.  That means that I spend 2 days preparing to leave the house, we are gone for the weekend, and then I spend 2 days recovering from the trip. That means in the past two weeks we have had 1 day a week where we can relax and follow our typical routine. This has made for a busy and slightly insane mama.

We had a great time in St.Louis and Kansas City.  The past two weeks had lots of firsts for Jacy.

• She went to a Mexican restaurant - with no pants on. PARTAAAAY
• She went to Grandma and Grandpa Rowbottom's house.
• She met Deo and Grandpa James. She also met Aunt Kari and Uncle Dave.  Along with a bunch of cousins and friends. 
• She was very spoiled by her aunts.  She was held the ENTIRE weekend and I only changed her diaper in the middle of the night.  Her aunts REALLY love her. 
• She went to her first Royals game.  It was awesome.  She was such a good girl.  
• She saw fireworks for the first time.  It was a BIG HIT!!!  She was very wide eyed and didn't even jump.  She seemed to really love it.  We have already had some talks about how fire is not safe.
• She met a bunch of Josh's family members.  They threw her a welcome to the family party. It was very sweet.  She now has more clothes than we know what to do with!
• I am sure there are more but I can't think right now. 

She is a very loved little girl.

We are also preparing for a trip to Tennessee to see one of our good friends get married.  This will be an great time and we are excited to go. A 10 hour car ride with a 2 month old might be tricky.  I am planning on updating everyone after this experience. I am glad that we have done a few smaller trips before attempting a big one.  I have learned a lot about traveling with our new, larger family. Now I need a nap!!!

These guys get no love anymore. Poor pugs...

The 4th Trimester

My good friend Amy was talking about the first 3 months with a baby is like your 4th trimester of pregnancy.  I Googled this term last night about about 3:30 am because I wondered if other people had this idea too.  Come to find out I had already read the book this idea came from.  I forgot everything when I was pregnant.  I also think I was just worried about the practical application.

The idea is this - A guy named Harvey Karp came up with the term to explain the baby's transition from womb to life.  It is 3 months long (approximately) and there are things you can do to help your baby's last trimester go smoothly.  They are the 5 S's -Swaddling, Side/Stomach Position, Shushing, Swinging, and Sucking.  These are great for baby and help a parent calm a little fuss bucket.  This is great and all, but really the 4th trimester is just as much about the parent's transition as well.

To help myself not only survive but also enjoy this time, I have created what I like to call the 5 G's and a Q.  Here they are in no particular order.

1. Go to Sleep! - It doesn't matter if you have company or it is 5:00 in the evening.  Go to sleep you will not regret it. 
2. Give it up! - Quit worrying about house work or actual work.  It will make you crazy  you cannot do everything at once.  Take out is your friend! 
3. Get a Dang Shower! - Daily or anytime you feel like crying.  This means some days I take 2 and suddenly feel 100% better about my life. 
4. Give In! - Hold that baby all day long if you wanna.  I love this and it will not last forever.  You cannot spoil a new born right?! (I hope this is true or we are in big trouble) 
5. Get Out the House! - It feels good to do normal human things like grocery shop or stop for coffee.  Babies are small and portable. Heck, you don't even have to pack bottles if you nurse.  Grab a diaper and go. 
6. Quiet Time - Get it in even if it is just a "quiet moment"- you always feel better after a little time with the Lord. Just sayin'

I do have to say, that the days I follow these I am a much happier, healthier woman. I also tend to get more stuff done - funny enough.  I need to remember these every day to keep my head on straight.  I DO NOT use this everyday, but I bet my husband wishes I did.

A Day During Jacy's First Month

Here is how my days go.  To keep track of the days, I start at midnight.  You will see why this works well.

12:00am - Put Jacy in bed.  This is about the time she goes down.
2:00am - Diaper change and nurse in the dark while I am half a sleep.
6:00am- Wake up to my alarm in a panic because Jacy slept for 4 hours.  Diaper change and nurse Jacy while I watch the news then go back to bed.
9:00am - Diaper change and nurse Jacy then go back to bed again.
10:30am - Diaper change and nurse Jacy then do a load of diapers and other random housework while Jacy is in her bassinet, swing, or bouncer seat.  She chills and sleeps during this time. I also get in a shower during this time.
12:00pm- Diaper chance and nurse Jacy and have lunch with Josh. He holds her a lot then I hold her. This is our prime sleepy baby snuggle time.
2:30pm - Diaper change and nurse Jacy.  She ussually stays awake for a little while we do some tummy time read books or she might spend time in the Moby Wrap while we do housework together.  She may also get a bath or go for a walk.  
4:00pm - Diaper change and nurse Jacy and take a nap if I can.
5:00pm - Josh comes home and we talk about his day.
7:00pm - Diaper change and nurse Jacy and eat dinner.  Jacy is also usually awake for a few minutes during this time and Josh plays with Jacy until she is hungry or sleepy again. I try to do some housework or I take a nap.
9:30pm - Diaper change and nurse Jacy. She is also awake for while again. We talk, tummy time, or play with dad. For some reason Jacy thinks from around 7-10 is the best time to be awake.  I think this is because she is her father's daughter.
10:30pm till 12:00 - I start trying to get Jacy to go to bed without success.  I nurse her for 10 minutes till she falls asleep and then I put her in her crib and she wakes up in 20 minutes. This continues till around midnight.  Josh sometimes gets her to go to bed by rocking her. During this time Josh and I watch TV while I do the nurse, put to bed, get back up cycle.  A few times Jacy has gone to bed around 11:00. It was awesome.

Tonight, Jacy is in bed at 9:00pm!!! That is how I got to write this blog post.  I really want to remember how crazy this time is so when her schedule is a little less demanding I can be thankful.  Now I better go to bed before this kid gets hungry again...
too late.

Baby Gotta Eat

As most people know I am attempting to nurse Jacy for the obvious financial and health benefits. I went in to this endeavor with what I thought was a lot of information under my belt. During our Bradley Method Classes we talked at length about breastfeeding for 2 of the 12 sessions. I attended 2 Le Leche League meeting before I delivered. I talked with anyone I could about nursing and how they had made it work. I checked out countless books from the library on the subject and even purchased a few to have on hand after Jacy came. With all that being said I had NO IDEA what it would actually be like to nurse a baby.

There are many things that no book or person makes totally clear in regards to nursing. The first being that it is a very messy procedure when you first start. I swear Jacy and I were both covered from head to toe in "people milk" as it is now called at our house. It got so bad that by the end of the day we would both smell like spoiled milk. This is not a joke, just ask Josh.

Also, Jacy and I had some troubles getting her to latch and stay awake. This was made much worse by the advice of some very well meaning nurses and lactation consultants at our hospital. When we first had trouble instead of saying "try again" or "try holding her a different way", they handed us a silicone sombrero that you put over your nipple called a nipple shield. I had only briefly read about these in some book. They were not discussed at our classes or at the Le Leche League meetings. I remembered that they were used for premature babies but I assumed that the people at the hospital knew better about such things. That was totally false. I ended up with bloody nipples and clogged milk ducts (ouch!!! and sorry for TMI) and a lazy baby. The only thing that got us over it was encouragement from my mom and friends and the outside lactation nurse at Kilgores Medical Pharmacy. Seriously, there was NO WAY I would breastfeeding right now if I had not gone to see Beth. It was amazing. She helped us loose the shield and get Jacy to eat with no trouble. We had to go see her quite a bit for weight checks and it was one of the most reassuring things I did during my first weeks home with Jacy. Not to mention it was free!? I love free.

Anyways, I really want to remember how tricky everything was and how the solution was so simple. I should have just followed my own new "mommy gut" and done what I thought was right for Jacy and I. The Good Lord would not give us a baby and leave us unequipped to care for her. I need to remember that.

Things I Can(not) Live Without

Here is a list of things that I cannot live without at this stage in the game. I would like to note that I am perfectly aware I could, realistically live without everything on the list. I just have no desire to do that. Also, I am perfectly aware that most of you do not care about this post. I just wanted to remember it if I ever decide to do this crazy thing again.

• Prefold Diapers - Holds everything all the time. Easy to change. Easy to clean. I am not sure how I am going to like the fancy pants diapers I have for Jacy when she gets older. If you have not tried prefolds, I highly recommend them.
• Video Monitor - Our house is super small and I could hear Jacy cry no matter where I am. The thing that makes the monitor so cool is that I can check on her without going in and letting her see me. This has also made sleeping easier because I do not have to get out of bed to see that it was a "in her sleep cry/coo" and not a "wake up and feed me lady cry". This has been awesome. We have a Summer Infant brand. LOVE IT!
• Tie Dyed Onesies. Too fun.Thanks Mellisa
• Changing Table - I do not like changing her anywhere else. It is too hard and stressful for me. I know I am crazy. (NOTE - We do not actually have a changing table. Just a changing pad thingy mounted to a dresser.)
• Breast Pump - Helped me through some tough spots.
• Colace and Tucks Pads - Also helped me through some tough spots.
• Bouncer Seat - Ours has some highfalutin name. I can't remember right now. It does everything. Thanks Aunt Rachelle and Aunt Donna. This thing keeps her awake and happy. CRAZY
• Swing - She falls asleep instantly.Sometimes it scares me!
• Moby Wrap - This should be called "Lets you get the dishes done machine." I love this. I get to snuggle my baby and write this blog post. WIN!
• My husband - He is the bomb. He knows that Jacy likes "jumps" and can change a prefold in his sleep. He also comes home for lunch and sometimes lets me get in a nap. He tells me to knock it off when I am being crazy. He watches TV with me in the evening even though he doesn't care for it because that is all I can do at this point.

The funny thing about this list is that these are not the things I thought I would find useful (with the exception on my husband) Parenthood is a trip.

NOTE - It took me 2, no 3, days and multiple attempts to write this.

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Prayer without Ceasing

If you want to work on the whole "pray without ceasing" thing, bring home a newborn baby. Take the past two hours for example. I had two friends over to chat and whatnot. During this time Jacy needed a diaper change. I left her lying on the couch next to my dear friend and I said "watch that girl" while I got the diaper. On the 12 foot walk to the diaper, I prayed that Ashley would catch her if she started to roll off (which at this point would make her the most advanced baby in all history) I then also prayed that she would not make a mess on the couch because I had never changed her there before. (and I don't care to do that very often in the future) I then realized I didn't have a wipe and the I prayed that her girl parts would be ok because I didn't wipe. (even though one book I read suggested not using wipes for non-poo diapers) I them started to feed her and my typical prayer of please make sure she gets enough food/please make sure she stays awake to eat started. I then realized I had not washed my hands, even though I had touched nothing unsanitary, so I prayed for germs to not find her. Then she had another diaper change and I prayed the typical, please don't let her get diaper rash prayer. Mind you, all of this was occurring while having two friends over and chatting. You should hear how much I pray when it is just Jacy and I at home. I am hoping I did not seem to distant while my friends were over. I was trying very hard to multitask.

I pray all day long. Please let her sleep- which is always followed by please let her wake up. Please help her eat well - which is always followed by please help my body provide the food. Please let her poop - which is always followed by please be the last poop for the next hour till the diapers get out of the dyer. The list could go on forever.

These are not idol "I wish" kind of prayers. These are real, true prayers that make me worry less about my sweet girl and remind me I am not the one in control of what happens to me or any member of my family. It sounds weird to say that all this prayer makes me worry less but it really does seem to help. Now I pray that I get some sleep!!!

My New (un)Job

This week Josh started his new job at Columbia College.  He is the Coordinator of Communication and Technology for the Student Affairs Department.  From my perspective, there are a lot of positive aspects to his new job.  Here are the top 10 in no particular order.

1. He works at a place he enjoys and believes in. (two time graduate of Columbia College)
2. We have health care and free/reduced tuition to Columbia College or a sister institution.  (masters work here we come.) 
3. He has a sweet office with a big ol' desk. 
4. He has a lot of technology equipment that he gets to use.
5. His coworkers are nice and are supportive of family life. 
6. He can come home for lunch and has somewhat flexible work hours.
7. His office is a few blocks from our home. 
8. We have access to the gym on campus and has a family sports pass to attend sporting events. (I know, but it is still a perk)
9.  He still works with students and gets to use his skills as an educator to help people be successful while seeking out an education.
10. He gets paid. 

 Since Josh's job has started by new "JOB" has also somewhat started.  My new job will really start when the kid gets out of me. So for now it is kind of a "soft opening" like at a new restaurant. My new (un)job has a lot of positive aspects too. Here are of the top 10 in no particular order.

1. Naps
2. Lost of time to catch up on reading 
3. The pugs do not have to be in the crate/inside all day. (less dog mom guilt) 
4. Lunch dates with Josh and other friends. 
5. Lots of time to respond to emails and Facebook messages.
6. Lots of time to get/keep the home in order. 
7. Lots of time to cook or bake new things.
8. Lots of time to catch up on unfished crafts. 
9. Lots of time for online bargain hunting/widow shopping/pinterest.
10. Lots of time....   

Although this time is a little boring, I am thankful for it.  Most people would kill for the kind of time I am getting right now.  To be honest, I am enjoying it more than I thought I would.  I think trying to enjoy everyday for what it is, is the key to being happy at any "job".  Josh and I are both starting a lot of new things and I hope we enjoy everything.  We shall see how we are both liking our new roles in a month.

Nursery Tour

The nursery is finished! It has been so much fun to make this little space for our baby.  Josh and I both put in a lot of work.  We worked together well and it took our time to enjoy doing it.  I can't wait to put our little baby in here!

view from the doorway

crib and storage

rocker and storage

changing station

Everything is ready and waiting for our newest family member. 

Waiting on the Babe

I am due in 10 days.  This means I can have the kid whenever he/she wants to come on out.  I have not been so great about waiting on our child to make their appearance.  With good reason!  I want to meet this little person who Josh and I will be sharing the rest of our lives with.  Come on, this is a harder wait than the pugs endure while I am filling up the kongs with peanut butter.

I do keep trying to remind myself, that giving my child the gift of time in the womb is one of the best things you can do for the baby.  There are a lot of biological process that occur when your body can go into labor on it's own. With that being said, if the doctor told me today that I could be induced.  I might say yes. I just can't wait. 

Here is a list of things I have been doing to pass the time.

• meeting with anyone/everyone for coffee
• watching random things on hulu plus
• playing Viva Pinata (a very lame children's computer game) for hours
• checking Facebook like a maniac
• shopping online without buying anything
• napping
• cleaning things
• swimming today with my friend Kristy
• going out to eat
• eating lots of sugary things 
• Pinterest
•  drinking ice tea (decaf) by the pitcher full 
• whining 
• reading books about birth/child care

That is what I have been doing.  Not many people tell you about this time spent in limbo but here is one gal's thoughts that I really liked. It is a little long but it sums up a lot of how I feel.

She’s curled up on the couch, waiting, a ball of baby and emotions. A scrambled pile of books on pregnancy, labor, baby names, breastfeeding…not one more word can be absorbed. The birth supplies are loaded in a laundry basket, ready for action. The freezer is filled with meals, the car seat installed, the camera charged. It’s time to hurry up and wait. Not a comfortable place to be, but wholly necessary.
The last days of pregnancy— sometimes stretching to agonizing weeks—are a distinct place, time, event, stage. It is a time of in between. Neither here nor there. Your old self and your new self, balanced on the edge of a pregnancy. One foot in your old world, one foot in a new world.
Shouldn’t there be a word for this state of being, describing the time and place where mothers linger, waiting to be called forward?
Germans have a word, zwischen, which means between. I’ve co-opted that word for my own obstetrical uses. When I sense the discomfort and tension of late pregnancy in my clients, I suggest that they are now in The Time of Zwischen. The time of in between, where the opening begins. Giving it a name gives it dimension, an experience closer to wonder than endurance.
I tell these beautiful, round, swollen, weepy women to go with it and be okay there. Feel it, think it, don’t push it away. Write it down, sing really loudly when no one else is home, go commune with nature, or crawl into your own mama’s lap so she can rub your head until you feel better. I tell their men to let go of their worry; this is an early sign of labor. I encourage them to sequester themselves if they need space, to go out if they need distraction, to enjoy the last hours of this life-as-they-now-know-it. I try to give them permission to follow the instinctual gravitational pulls that are at work within them, just as real and necessary as labor.
The discomforts of late pregnancy are easy to Google: painful pelvis, squished bladder, swollen ankles, leaky nipples, weight unevenly distributed in a girth that makes scratching an itch at ankle level a feat of flexibility.  “You might find yourself teary and exhausted,” says one website, “but your baby is coming soon!” Cheer up, sweetie, you’re having a baby. More messaging that what is going on is incidental and insignificant.
What we don’t have is reverence or relevance—or even a working understanding of the vulnerability and openness a woman experiences at this time. Our language and culture fails us. This surely explains why many women find this time so complicated and tricky. But whether we recognize it or not, these last days of pregnancy are a distinct biologic and psychological event, essential to the birth of a mother.
We don’t scientifically understand the complex hormones at play that loosen both her hips and her awareness.  In fact, this uncomfortable time of aching is an early form of labor in which a woman begins opening her cervix and her soul. Someday, maybe we will be able to quantify this hormonal advance—the prolactin, oxytocin, cortisol, relaxin. But for now, it is still shrouded in mystery, and we know only how to measure thinning and dilation.

“You know that place between sleep and awake, the place where you can still remember dreaming? That’s where I’ll always love you, Peter Pan. That’s where I’ll be waiting.”        -Tinkerbell

I believe that this is more than biological. It is spiritual. To give birth, whether at home in a birth tub with candles and family or in a surgical suite with machines and a neonatal team, a woman must go to the place between this world and the next, to that thin membrane between here and there. To the place where life comes from, to the mystery, in order to reach over to bring forth the child that is hers. The heroic tales of Odysseus are with us, each ordinary day. This round woman is not going into battle, but she is going to the edge of her being where every resource she has will be called on to assist in this journey.
We need time and space to prepare for that journey. And somewhere, deep inside us, at a primal level, our cells and hormones and mind and soul know this, and begin the work with or without our awareness.
I call out Zwischen in prenatals as a way of offering comfort and, also, as a way of offering protection. I see how simple it is to exploit and abuse this time. A scheduled induction is seductive, promising a sense of control. Fearful and confused family can trigger a crisis of confidence. We are not a culture that waits for anything, nor are we believers in normal birth; waiting for a baby can feel like insanity. Giving this a name points her toward listening and developing her own intuition. That, in turn, is a powerful training ground for motherhood.
Today, I am waiting for a lovely new mother named Allison to call me, to announce that her Zwischen is ended and labor has begun. I am in my own in between place, waiting. My opportunity to grow and open is a lovely gift she gives me, in choosing me to attend her birth. - Jana Studelska

Cloth Diapers

If you have every ventured out into new mommy blogs you will soon realize that cloth diapers are a big fat deal.  People in blogger land who cloth diaper talk about it a lot.  I think part of the reason of why this happens is because it can be hard to talk about it face to face with people.  I mean, I have a group of girlfriends who also use cloth and we chat. I also have some super supportive family who helped us out by buying us diapers. But for the most part, if you tell people you are planning on venturing into this world of reusable diapers, people look at you like you are crazy.  These are some comments I have gotten after people found out our family was planning on cloth diapering.

•     We will see how long that lasts.  
•     That's a nice idea. (looks away quickly)  
•     Can you even buy those? 
•     Not when you leave the house right?! 
•     Where will you wash them? ( I usually want to respond with "on a rock down by the crick")   
•     What?! Why?! 
•     You are going to put your hands in the toilet?! 
•     Is is because Josh lost his job? (only one really interesting person said this and I am sure they felt bad immediately) 
•     I am glad you care about the environment so much. I wish I could do that.  I just don't have it in me.  
•     Yeah... just you wait. 

I really hate the last one most of all.  I think I hate it the most because I am SO aware I have no idea what it is like to have a baby.  I know that I have no clue what it will be like to bring home this little person who is constantly in need and will be demanding of my time.  BUT I also know that I am not a dummy. People make a ton of decisions before the baby comes.  cradle or bassinet, breastfeed or formula, family practice or pediatrician, the list goes on and on.

Other people do this cloth diapering thing and I have very little expectations about how my time should be spent now that I am home full time. I also know that I am willing to sacrifice a lot of things in order to spend this precious time with my kid.  Even if that means washing dirty diapers every day.  (I hope it is more like every other day *fingers crossed*)

I think that everyone has the things they are willing and not willing to sacrifice to get anything in life.  I have things I would NOT be willing to do to stay home and for now those things have not come up.  Everyone gives up something.  One of mine might be the ease of throwing poop out in the trash.  I don't think my choices are right for everyone. One of the best parts of being a parent is there are so many ways to do it well.  I can see that from just looking around at my friends and family.  I am sure Josh and I will find a way that works for us but most of all, we will find a way that works best for our child.

Josh knows how to put on a prefold. 

We have practiced. 

He is a boss.

I Think I'm Alone Now

I have been at home alone for the past 4 days.  I normally HATE it when Josh is gone and I am stuck at home.  Not to mention that Josh took our only car and I was really stuck at home as it is too hot to walk anywhere. While Josh was enjoying the All-Star Game and the surrounding festivities, I got a lot of things done. Here is a short list of things I did.

• Revamped the bathroom with new navy accents.  I added a polka dot stripe to our shower curtain, made a soap dispenser, and decorated some hand towels to match.  It looks great. It makes our bathroom not look so white.
• I prepared all our cloth baby diapers for use.  I plan on doing a post about this so that is all I will say for now. 
• I cleaned the bedroom. 
• I finished the baby's room.  I am also going to do a post on this. more to come. 
• I made some more baby gifts for my pregnant friends.  This was fun. 
• Did some all around crafting while I could spread out and not worry about getting in Josh's way. 
• Hung out with some friends and talked about babies, life, and good movies.  I had a good time with everyone coming over to see me.  We don't have people over at our house very often and it was fun to show everyone the baby's room. 
• I watched the entire series of 'The Event".  It was not horrible but I wouldn't run and rent it. It was good company while I did other things. Any cheesy sci-fi series works well for me.  I currently have on "Persons Unknown" which is fulfilling my need for some noise in the house. 
• I attempted to create my own wool dyer balls like these.  But it was an epic fail.  I tried 3 times using 2 different tutorials so I think I will just buy them.  I might try one more time for my wallet's sake.
• Took lots of naps. LOTS 

I surprisingly had a good time while Josh was away. I think it helped that I felt like this might be the only time I have left to be alone for any stretch of time.  I spent a lot of time thinking about how different it will be when the baby gets here and will constantly be attached to me. I know that I will take time off when we get a babysitter or Josh takes the kid somewhere for a few hours.  I also know that our life is going to be drastically different in 4 weeks (or less) in ways that I cannot even imagine. I am looking forward to that.

I am so thankful for the past 5 years I have had with Josh when it was just him and I. I am also thankful for the little person we are about to welcome into out home. I am sure our lives will never be the same. I am also glad he is home now.
 It was getting a little lonely.

Love and Hate

Things I LOVE while pregnant.

• Nutella - I used to not care so much about this.  Now I care. I care deeply. 
• Pillows - These are a must in all places and situations 
• Cleaning - It makes me feel so much better about everything 
• Showers - Not just a necessary to keep friends anymore!
• Yoga Ball - this also makes me feel better
• Leggings - I look tore up but feel great 
• Air Conditioning - nough said
• Ice - I used to hate ice in my drink.  Now it is mandatory
• Milk - it will fix heartburn in a few seconds. I am still not a huge fan of the taste 
• Nonfiction Books - mostly about child birth or parenting. The list is long... for another day
• Being at Home - This is weird for me.  
• Josh

Things I HATE while pregnant.

• My Dogs - they want to sit on me and look at me all the time.  They go bonkers if they cannot be in the same room as me.  Currently I am working on Hamlet to quit licking my leg. grrrr
• Sleeping in Bed - mostly because I don't sleep in bed.  I mostly flop around and drive Josh crazy. 
• My Crafting Stuff - this is a love hate thing.  It just takes up so much space
• Being Outside Ever - too hot
• Cooking - I can cook it OR eat it.  I can rarely do both. 
• Shoes - I only have one pair left that fit and it is not looking so good.  I prefer to just go barefoot
• Smells - of all sorts

Baby Room Part 2

So, we have been working on this kid's room for a while and I am happy to say that we are getting closer .  Which is important since my due date is in 28 days! CRAZY!

Here is what we have done since my last post 

Josh spent some time putting together furniture. First he put together a dresser we got from Target.  It was quite a project. He then put together the crib and cubby system we bought for extra storage.  I was not allowed to be in the room while he was working. (for obvious reasons) So, I only have a few pictures of the furniture building.

I really love this crib.  It is large and yellow.  I think it looks great as a focal point of the room. It is not for everyone but it is for me.  I made the bed skirt for it which I saw on an internet tutorial.  It is cool because it will adjust to the correct height when we move the mattress down when the kid gets bigger. It was also SUPER easy to make.  I would guess that the whole thing start to finish was no more than 20 minutes.

  I love a fast craft.

Next Josh and I made cornice boards for over the windows. We did not want to weigh down the small room with big curtains and I really like how these ones look. It took us quite a while but it was quicker than sewing curtains. 

Josh spent a lot of time painting furniture we had white to match the new stuff we bought.  He painted a bookshelf that Josh's grandpa made years ago and a rocking chair that we got for a steal at "Hidden Treasures".  You can really talk those people down. I made a cushion for it that I am not so crazy about. I didn't have to buy anything to make it this size because I had some left over foam from a Craigslist purchase that I made about a year ago. You get what you get. 

I also painted a toy box that is in the shape of a giraffe.  It was a fun thing to do one weekend.  It turned out nice but when we went to apply the clear coat it got a little messy.  It still looks okay and will hold toys. That is the point.

Here is what the room currently looks like.  We have a ways to go but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. 

 

 Dramatic room reveal coming up next.

All Colors Go Together

My good friend Meg always says "All colors go together"and this is definitely the approach I have been taking in the baby room. In fact this is an approach that I take to most projects that I am working on. In regards to the kid's space, I have to be careful because there are not a lot of restrictions to be put on a baby room and I could get really crazy.

One way that I wanted to add some color was by making a baby mobile that would go over the crib.  I kind of had an idea of what I wanted to do based on a picture I saw on the internet. There was a lot I liked about this mobile but wanted something that would be easy to make and not so girly.  I also had the issue of one sided paint samples and not wanting to cut out circles.

The one I made

The one I saw

            

Now as most of my close friends know,  I require quite a bit of "thinking time" for any project I am going to do.  This means that I don't plan anything out on paper or make a sample.  Instead, I just think about a project for an unusual amount of time. In this case it was about 3 weeks from the day I picked up (a.k.a. stole) the paint samples to the the day I started the project.

I first cut the paint strips into 1 inch pieces using my quilting mat, quilter's ruler, and a rotary tool.  I did this while I watched a movie with Josh. I love any kind of mindless work.

Next I set out my pieces.  As you can see on the top left picture, some pieces were naturally longer than others due to different widths of the samples.  I liked this. I then started hot-gluing them on a piece of clear thread.  I did not measure or anything.  I just placed them how I saw fit.  This got A LOT easier as I went and I eventually got into a groove where I could glue fairly fast.  The hard part was that I then had to glue another piece on the back. This was not so fun to line all these little pieces up.  Although, this did get easier.

When I was done gluing I just tied each thread onto a mobile topper I had bought at goodwill about 2 years ago.  (yes, 2 years ago) I attached a piece of ribbon and stuck it above the crib.  I think it looks great! Total cost ZERO DOLLARS! (If you only count things I bought this year)

Baby Room Part 1

Our house it a very cute little home. Emphasis on the little.  This makes for some very creative problem solving when it comes to how we use our space.  Now, I do need to say that we are not as space savvy as some who live in one bedroom or studio apartments in a big city.  Those people are awesome at keeping their spaces multifunctional and beautiful.  Josh and I are doing our best at using our space in the most efficient way possible. 

With this being said, we are putting our baby in a closet. Not to worry. This closet is big. It has three windows and a cable outlet.  Most people would not even call it a closet but that is what it was when we moved into our home. We took out all of the racks and shelves and this is what we ended up with.

 Once the room was empty.  Josh and his brother had to put in a vent.  This room had no AC or heat which might be reason the previous owners used it as a closet. It also has a very odd, offset light fixture.  We have no idea what we are going to do about this.  Probably nothing. You can see it above Josh's head near the door. It blinds you if you look towards the doorway. Hmmmm...

 Once this was done.  Josh painted and added trim.  The walls are a light gray. I like the color a lot.  At first I wanted a shade darker, but I think because the room is so small it helps make it look bigger.  Josh also added new baseboards which was desperately needed. This is what we ended up with.

My husband worked very hard on all of this with very little help from me. Especially when you think about that we were using this space for an office and some storage. It was A LOT of work to move all the stuff out and then get working on the room.  He is a great husband and I know he will be an awesome dad.